Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Bye 2008! Gfy!

Good riddance to bad rubbish, I say.

In fact, I'm really happy that we're into the last year of this decade. (Shaddup Greg, I'm referring to public perception not actual reality) In my not-so-humble opinion, there were only 5 good things to come out of this decade: Julie, Joey, Emma, Andy, and YouPorn. That's about it.

This should be a fun NYE. We'll be at Julie's sister's house which is stumbling distance away. My dad is watching the boys, my mom is watching the Princess. I have a case of Schlafly Oktoberfest. I'm off work tomorrow. I'm spending the day hydrating myself. And Greg is Kanadian.

It never fails, though. And I may have mentioned this last year. I always have a very strange feeling on NYE. I can't really put my finger on it to describe it. Kinda a heightened sense of awareness. Also a heightened sense of empathy. It's just strange. Throw a few more drinks on top of that than I really need... Well. Thank God for Julie.

Have I mentioned that 2-year-olds are a pain in the ass?

Julie made some pizzas a few days ago. Instead of putting ham on them she used Kanadian bacon. Joey asked why Kanadians call it bacon. I told him it's because they're so stupid they think ham is bacon. My kids must think Kanadians are the biggest idiots in the world.

2008 suxed. 2009 can't be worse.

OBTW, thank you Manbearpig! I really enjoyed yesterday's weather. Please come back!

Monday, December 29, 2008

Pulled Pork: Julie FTW!

I'm a perfectionist when it comes to pork. Especially when I'm not the one preparing it. That said, I've had a pork shoulder sitting in the deep freeze for a year now, it was time to do something. The plan was to smoke it and have pulled pork. Well, it's too cold to sit in front of a smoker all day. So Julie decided to make it.

You can imagine how picky I was with MY pork shoulder!

So she ripped into it. She used an awesome rub, seared it, then baked it. It was so tender she was able to shred it by hand. Then this homemade sauce she made...

Let's just say that I tried to harass her when I started eating. "It needs less salt" or something along those lines. But it didn't last long. I gave up. Pulled pork: Julie wins.

I woke up around 4am and had one thing on my mind: Pulled pork.

Finally I made it to about 10:15. That's late enough. It's 12:15 somewhere. Time for lunch.

Julie's pulled pork rox!

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Another Great Christmas!

Well, it's come and gone. Christmas. My favorite time of the year.

You would have never known it was a recessionary Christmas to look at the kids. They did great. Julie and I picked up a few small things for each other as well. But as you know we didn't get anything for anyone else this year. And ya know what? It sure seemed to cut down on the stress!

We couldn't make the Key celebration this year, which really sux. The Key Christmas is always a lot of fun. The problem is that it was Christmas day. We do Christmas day at our house with Julie's family and the few Kelleys that are here in the STL area. Also with the honorary Kelleys.

A fun time was had by all. We all ate too much to get drunk, so no drunken funness ensued, but it was fun anyway. :)

Now we get to go through and pull some old toys to give to Goodwill or something. Holy crap we have a lot of new toys in this house.

We got at least one squeal out of all the kids this year. They really had a great Christmas.

This year the kids got a LOT of presents. Nothing was real expensive, the idea was quantity AND quality. In other words, a lot of inexpensive, yet fun, things. Guess what? It worked! We won't get away with it much longer as the kids age, so we'll take it while we can.

Merry Fucking Christmas Becky, wherever you are! You were on my mind every time I said "Merry Christmas" to someone.

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Twas the Night Before Christmas

We had a great Christmas Eve. We were both off work. I finished wrapping presents today. Yeah. You heard me. I'm the one who does the Christmas present wrapping around here. And I've always hated it. I'm good at it for whatever reason (Patience (formerly known as P but from whom I now have permission to use her name) says it's the price I pay for being gay) so that means I do the wrapping.

I'll pause while you go back and read that sentence again for clarity. Ok now read it again. Yes Greg, that should be a perfectly viable English sentence. Obfuscated as hell but viable.

So anyway I always hated wrapping because of the cutting. Last year Julie got a $9 wrapping paper cutter thingy made by Scotch. The thing is she bought it after Christmas so she paid $1 for it.

This thing rox. It actually made presents FUN again. Not that they were ever really a hoot and a holler.

So yeah, presents were wrapped. We went to my mom's for my stepdad's family's Christmas family function. That was fun as always. Ham roxed!

We were home with the bratasses in bed by 8:30. We cleaned up a bit for tomorrow's festivities. Moved the presents upstairs. Santa, Julie, and I had a beer. She went to bed. I downloaded the new just-released MediaPortal 1.0. Then I posted this. Now I'm going to bed.

Merry Christmas to All, and to Greg gfy.

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

I Miss Manbearpig!

Wow it's cold! Manbearpig please come back!

I have made a lot of posts about Manbearpig. For those of you who haven't caught onto the connection, Manbearpig was a South Park character created to represent Algore's whacked-out idea of global warming. Therefore, Manbearpig is actually a direct reference to global warming.

I sure wish global warming would happen. I'm sick of these record lows. That's it I'm going to go drive my V8 for no apparent reason so I can help bring back Manbearpig.

Brrrrr!!!!!

(Hey P... Remember when we were talking about this and you said you wanted to go back and read the Manbearpig posts? clicky)

Monday, December 22, 2008

Tweets from a Plane Crash

Wow. This is a very interesting read. Kinda says something about the times as well. Read from the bottom up. Read the intro paragraph especially if you're not familiar with Twitter.

Clickie

Sunday, December 21, 2008

Emma's Amazing Talent

Like her grandfather, she can fart on command. Not very princess-like, but that's ok.

Yeah.

Thursday, December 18, 2008

Ouch. That Hurt.

So I haven't really said anything because it shouldn't bother me but dangit it does. When we pulled into the parking lot of the hospital on Wednesday for Andy's speech therapy (aka ST), he said, "No. No. No."

He didn't want to go to the hospital. I'm sure he didn't know why but he knew that he didn't want to go there.

Ouch. That hurt. Ouchie.

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

2008 - Much Better Than 2006 - 2007!

2006 and 2007 sucked. Everyone died in 2006. It was one after another. The only good thing to come out of 2006 was Andy. If I had to sum up 2006 in a word it would be: loss.

2007 sucked. People continued to die. And my son picked up this little disease known as cancer. I spent all of my energy on Andy. And the constant fear didn't really help any. If I had to sum up 2007 in a word it would be: exhaustion.

2008 was much better. It has been an awkward year for me personally. The first part of the year was pretty much putting a cap on the whole cancer thing. Since then it's been all about healing. Physically and developmentally for Andy. Mentally and emotionally for Julie and me. In fact if I had to sum up 2008 in a word it would be: healing.

For those of you who have known me for some time you know that I've changed over the last 18 months or so. That is, I'm really not the same as I was before this whole cancer thing. I have a different perspective on life. I think I'm still trying to find myself. Right now I'm pretty much a dad and I'm living day to day. I guess I really don't have time to be anything else. 3 young kids will do that to anyone I suppose. Julie's pretty much in the same situation.

I'm curious to see what 2009 will bring. Although for those of you who really know me you know that my new year begins on April 11. But the time between now and then starts to set the foundation of the coming year.

We'll see what happens.

Andy has speech therapy tonight. He's making progress.

Monday, December 15, 2008

New Site Feature

"You Need a Pet!" Look to your right. -->

Ok Greg. Now look to the right again. But down a little.

Unless this post is no longer at the top then you may need to look up.

Why do I even bother, I know you're going to make a smartass comment no matter what.

Adopt a pet. NOW! DO IT!

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Canadian Cardiovascular Meeting

Something along those lines. I'm not even going to comment. Clicky

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Rick is the man!

I just rickrolled myself just to hear the song. I'll admit it.

Friday, December 12, 2008

What a Week

I won't go into details because it will bore you. Suffice it to say it's been a rough week that really started about last Thursday and went straight through a weekend. By the time I got home in the evening I was frazzled all week.

I've decided to 100% distance myself from work this weekend. I didn't bring my laptop home. I left it on incase something really bad happens and I can then remote into it from home. But yeah, I didn't bring my laptop home. For the weekend. This hasn't happened in a long time.

Yay! The weeks is over!

But incase anyone happens to be Googling something along the lines of "wireless clients roam to distant access points" and you happen to be using "Cisco wireless controllers" then the most likely fix is to disable "aggressive load balancing."

Sorry for that strange paragraph. But the end result is that soon enough this will have a permalink high enough up on the results of various searches that it will provide help to someone having a particular problem which is probably somewhat common.

Oh by the way, hello to all of you Googlers searching for "Tina Fey nude"

Tuesday, December 9, 2008

EHR

It stands for Electronic Health Records. As you know I'm in IT. As you also know I'm in Healthcare. You can imagine how EHR is impacting us.

We're very specialized in what we do. One of my specialties is wireless networking. I've had wireless problems at one of our hospitals that went live with EHR over the weekend. Basically I've lived there since Sunday, although a good portion of my Saturday was spent on the problem as well.

The problems are now fixed. I will now be spending the evening mentally healing.

See ya tomorrow.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Shitter Was Full!

I love Christmas Vacation. In fact if you go to any of my family functions around this time of year, or any time of year for that matter, you'll hear lines quoted from that movie quite often.

The day after Thanksgiving, I work 4 hours. Then I come home, turn on that movie, and start decorating for Christmas. This year Joey really got into that movie too. It looks like the tradition is passing down to the next generation.

w00t!

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

Attention Digital Artists (and wannabes)

I'm not going into much detail here on purpose. But I need a graphic. It needs to include the following:


  • Cancer Sux!
  • Saint Baldrick's 2009
  • Somthing to do with Andrew Kelley
  • A St. Patty's Day-looking clover
  • 3 Colors max, preferably 2


Please e-mail your submission to me. If you take out the reference to Greg you'll have my e-mail address: dan@thegregsuxkelleys.org Basically it goes from teh e in the to the k in kelleys. Just trying to avoid spam.

I would prefer a professional format. If it MUST be a BMP or something like that, make sure it's very high resolution, 400dpi or better.

Thank you!

My Hair Won't Grow!

Holy crap. It's growing on the sides and back but not the top! This may be my last year for Baldrick's.

If nothing else I'll be beard shaving. :)

For those of you who donated at Andy's birthday party, I just made that donation on our behalf. Thank you!

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

Happy Kanada Day!

December 2 is quite a day. Everyone grab your Munchos, Dr. Pepper, and quiche. Rape an elk. Watch hockey. Play every ace. Put on some Celine. And wish Greg a happy birthday.

Also, Grandpa Kelley would have been 83 today.

Also, my aunt whom I never met would have been... not sure... today.

Munchos. Breakfast of Kanadians.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Flashback

If you've ever had flashbacks, be it from strong memories (a la PTSD) or for "other" reasons, you know how weird they are. I get them occasionally. I just had one. Actually I'm still having it. It's the strangest feeling in the world. Kinda like deja vu but not really.

I know that it's not a year ago (or longer). I know things have changed. Yet. Well, I can't really describe it. The general feeling is there. More than that, this one is very weird in that I have an overwhelming need to get Andy's TPN ready. You'll remember TPN is "food" (nutrients) via IV. We had to hook him up every night around this time.

I'm looking where we kept the supplies. I know they're not there. I can't see them. But on the other hand I feel like they're there. But they're not. But they are.

I can't shake the feeling that I need to prepare his TPN. In fact it's starting to become quite an urgent feeling.

No, I'm not crazy. No, I'm not on drugs. No I'm not drunk. Yes I've been taking my meds. No I'm not Kanadian.

This has to be one of the strangest things that's happened to me in a long time.

Fortunately writing about it has made it pretty much go away. That's why I sat down to write this out. It's as therapeutic now as it was a year ago.

Go hug your children and thank God that they're healthy.

I still like cashews.

A Normal Thanksgiving!

If you think back to a year ago you'll remember Andy's counts were perilously low. Like the only reason he wasn't in the hospital was because the oncologist on duty was in a good mood and wanted him to be home for the holiday.

Oh my how things change. This year we were back to normal. We spent the morning (and first football game) at Julie's parents' house. We spent the afternoon (and second football game) at my mom's house. My dad forgot to come over on Friday.

Basically, a typical Thanksgiving for the Kelleys. And I loved every minute of it.

And here's the great news. I was sick. I had a cold. Although I've had a reprieve for the last 3 or 4 years, I'm always sick on either Thanksgiving or Christmas. I'm happy when I'm sick on Thanksgiving because it means I'll be healthy and ready to go on Christmas!

OBTW... Hinder Rox! And rumor has it they will be opening for Crue! rox!

Saturday, November 29, 2008

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

St. Baldrick's 2009!

Friends, family, Kanadians, and the rest of my stalkers,

Cancer Sucks!

With that out of the way, let's see what we can do to help find cures for childhood cancers. You know a great way to do it? Well I do. Help St. Baldrick's! Yeah. Come on out to Helen Fitzgeralds on Saturday, March 7, 2009 from 12-8pm. Throw back a few drinks and watch me get my hair and maybe even a beard buzzed.

But I always shave my head? Well you haven't seen me lately. To celebrate the anniversary of Andy's unofficially being cancer-free, I stop shaving my head on 10/31. That gives it quite some time to grow out and be ratty.

Plus, I've heard that this year Julie may even be getting her hair buzzed!

Fun and games aside, think about something for a minute. One day everything is just fine, the next day you're being told that your child, your own precious innocent flesh and blood, has cancer. You ask questions about prognosis. They can't be answered. You have to wait to see what MRI and CT scans look like. You have to wait to see if he or she will respond to chemo. You have to shave his or her head as hair starts to fall out. You have to clean up puke because of the nasty side effects of chemo. You have to wake up every morning only to learn all over again that this may be your last Christmas with your baby.

No matter how old you are, cancer sucks. But when it happens to a child, a baby, that did nothing wrong, it is a life-changing experience for everyone, regardless of the outcome.

The proceeds from St. Baldrick's events go toward finding cures for childhood cancer. Please help in any way you can. Even if it's just a dollar! I know these are trying economic times, but surely you can afford $5? $10? Maybe even $20?

Please go donate today. Honor Andrew Kelley by donating to have my head shaved at http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/shavee_info?ParticipantKey=2009-55917.

One final note. This Thanksgiving, be most thankful that your children are healthy. And if you don't have children, be thankful that you are healthy.

Thank you for your support. It truly means a lot to us.

- Dan, Julie, Andy, Emma, and Joey

P.S. Hey "Neighbor" - I'll (finally) submit your check for you. Thank you!

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Thanksgiving

I am thankful that it is not last year. Remember last Thanksgiving? We're a very traditional family and had to forego our Thanksgiving traditions. We had a nice one, but still. And we missed seeing a lot of family. Andy was fresh off a hospital visit and his counts were very low. I was still reeling from the loss of my life mentor. But at least we were all happy that Andy's surgery was successful.

I don't really want to dwell on it.


  • I'm thankful that it is not last year.
  • I'm thankful Andy is cured.
  • I'm thankful we get to have a normal holiday season this year.
  • I'm thankful Joey's doing so well in school.
  • I'm thankful Julie found me in my early 20's or I wouldn't have made it to 30. And I truly believe that.
  • I'm thankful I have a wonderful wife and kids.
  • I'm thankful we have a wonderful extended family in P&B.
  • I'm thankful Greg is not Kanadian by blood (sorry P).
  • I'm thankful for the McRib.
  • I'm thankful that we're starting to get our heads above water financially (again).
  • I'm thankful that I get to trash Greg's house this Christmas.
  • I'm thankful for girls who are too pretty for pr0n but are nice enough to do it anyway.
  • I'm thankful that my golf swing was better this year.
  • I'm thankful that I'm healthy enough to play golf.
  • I'm thankful for the whole 80's revival thing going on musically.
  • I'm thankful for Schlafly beer.
  • I'm thankful that I'm old enough to have been there when GnR had real music. Metallica too.
  • I'm thankful that I'm young enough to not remember John Lennon being shot. (ooo! don't you feel old now?)
  • I'm thankful that I work in an industry that is growing despite the recession.
  • I'm thankful for not having ended a sentence with a preposition, rock on!

OMG! I'm Not a Gamer Anymore!

WTF happened? When I was a small child I had a Caleco Vision with the Atari 2600 adapter. I played Donkey Kong and PacMan nonstop. Then, of course, I played ET. Like the rest of the gaming world, I gave up on video games after ET.

I then switched over to the Commodore 64 and played Ultima III and Ultima IV. Then to the PC. Add Ultima V. Ultima VI. Etc.

Then there was the NES. I was all about Super Mario Bros I, II, and III. Mega Man. Dragon Warrior. Zelda. Etc.

I played that until the Sega Genesis. I used to sit around listening to Stone Temple Pilots playing NHL 95 for hours on end. And Mortal Kombat of course.

Then it was back to the PC. Wolf3d. Doom. Quake. Quake 2. Quake 3. Soldier of Fortune. You get the idea. FPS games. There was also my on-again-off-again love affair with Ultima Online that started in 1997 and continues to this day.

Enter the PS1. And the PS2. Sure there were other games but it was all about the Madden franchise. Hours upon hours, games upon games, seasons upon seasons.

Finally my PS2 died a couple years ago. Because of the price of the PS3 and XBOX 360, there was no way I was going to upgrade. Back to the PC. More Ultima Online. The occasional trip into Oblivion or Sim City Societies.

Then Andy got sick. That pretty much put an end to my UO addiction. And for some reason I can't get back into it.

I was thinking of giving WoW a shot. But ya know. $15 a month. For a game that I will rarely, if at all, play. Can't see it.

Why can't I get into video games anymore? They're just not fun. Maybe that's why I like DnD? Because it's back to the basics, no hard drives, no CPUs, no RAM, no display adapters, no controllers, etc. Or maybe because it's fun playing an annoying little pissant of a gnome bard?

Or maybe it's because I'm so sick of people screaming, "lol j00 got pwnz3d n00b! now gfy"

Crap Weasel.

Monday, November 24, 2008

The Axl Rose Experiment

I refuse to call them GnR. GnR only has 2 albums - Appetite and Lies. The Illusions are great albums that feature some of the guys from GnR. Spaghetti suxed. You get the idea.

Like most things Axl has done in the 20 years that have gone by since 1988, it sux. The music isn't bad but Axl's singing... jeez... Unbearable.

Kinda made me feel old when I read a user review on iTunes from a kid saying his mom used to listen to GnR when she was his age.

Words of Wisdom from my Dad

"A recession is when my neighbor loses his job. A depression is when I lose my job."

I like it.

For those of you who don't know, a recession has many possible technical meanings, but a generally-accepted meaning could be when there is negative GDP.

The difference between a recession and a depression is that recessions are self-correcting in time. Depressions are not.

The Great Depression (note the caps) was a combination of many unfortunate events that led to a long period of severe depression.

Companies now have trillions and trillions of dollars in cash. Newer regulations are in place. Even if we do enter a depression (not capitalized) you'll see that it will not be anything like the Great Depression.

Personal opinion? Everyone not in New York or California will come out of this recession within 400 days. New York and / or California may have a worse problem. Screw them.

Speaking of Kalifornia.... Why the hell are so many people STILL opposed to ghey marriage? So you may have religious opposition. Why should you force your religious views on everyone? Isn't that what Al Qaeda does? "Me: 1. You: 0"

I'm still opposed to Kanadian marriage.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

I Say You CAN Make Up Sleep!

I don't care what the experts say. When I'm on call I miss a lot of sleep. So that Saturday and/or Sunday I usually sleep in. And by sleep in I mean sleep in. Like I don't get out of bed until 10:00.

And you know what? I always feel so much better!

Sometimes when we really have problems I'll be awake for 24 hours or longer. By the time I get home I pass out. And I pass out hard. For at least 12 hours or so.

I saw you CAN make up sleep. Screw the experts.

Friday, November 21, 2008

B. Hussein Obama Taps Timothy Geithner for Treasury Secretary

Who is Timothy Geithner? I wondered the same. http://blogs.wsj.com/economics/2008/11/21/who-is-timothy-geithner/

Ok. Sure. So he was, "a key architect of the $30 billion bailout to prevent the bankruptcy of Bear Stearns Cos." Not a good thing if you ask me, but before foresight was 20/20, it wasn't really that horrible. Outside of that, he looks ok.

We'll see.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

No Thoughts Yet

Ok people, quit asking me. I'm not going to really post anything about the big 3 and their bailout just yet. You all know how I feel about it. I feel the same as you (unless your union of course). And yes I think it's funny that they showed up in private jets. And yes I think it's funny that none raised their hands to volunteer to sell those jets.

I don't think they'll get much help. I want to wait and see what is proposed. I'm hearing a thousand different ideas. Some good. Some bad. Some.. well.. we'll see.

Sorry. I have no thoughts yet, other than the same thoughts that you have.

I'll add this. Kit Bond was on KMOX this morning. Keep in mind he's actually a Republican. He's for helping them. With a few catches. The most notable is that the money will come from $50B that was already appropriated to go to the big 3 anyway, only in the form of alternate energy blah blah blah. So basically give them their own money only for different purposes.

So there ya have it. More on this later, I'm sure.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

A Random Thought

Since I've been getting into DnD lately (thanks for that P), I was thinking. If I had a DnD character that was a Harper, I'd name it Hannah.

If you get the joke, you're a perv. If you don't you're a prude. Either way you suck.

Monday, November 17, 2008

SPRINTing Toward Bankruptcy

Sprint announced late last week that it is offering voluntary buyout packages to a number of its employees in an attempt to cut costs due to falling subscribership. The company lost over a million subscribers in the 3rd quarter alone. Interestingly enough, they're the only wireless company to have such crazy declines in subscribers.

Why?

Well, as of tomorrow Julie and I will be moving from Sprint to AT&T. So maybe I can provide some insight from a subscriber's point of view.

Julie and I have both been with Sprint for years. Both of us have been with Sprint for something along the lines of 10 years. That's close to 20 years of service between the two of us. At an average cost of $60 / month, that's about $14,000.

With that kind of customer loyalty, you'd think we'd get a little something in return. What do we get in return? Let's take a look.

Once our contract expires, we get notices. Sign up now and get $150 toward a new phone. So we go to shop for a new phone. There's one for $150! That means free, right? Nope. You either get $150 off the $300 phone for signing up as a new customer or you can get $150 off the $300 phone for being an existing customer. In other words, the cost of the phone, no matter what, is $150. You don't save any money for being an existing customer.

Long story short, they do absolutely nothing for you.

So let's take this one step further. I contacted Sprint and told them I'll sign a new 2-year contract if they can do something above and beyond for us.

Never so much as received a confirmation that my e-mail was received.

We even tried going into the Sprint store. They were unwilling to budge. I told them they would lose a long-time customer. They walked away and moved onto the next customer.

If you're going to overcharge for a service, you'd better take care of your customers. If you don't, you'll lose them.

Bye Sprint! Thanks for nothing!

I... Uh... Wha????

Rams? What was that? Against the 49ers? I just can't... Wow.

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Fiscally-Responsible Christmas Ideas

Here's the short list:
1) Only buy for your immediate family.
2) One "big" present per kid.
3) Two "small" presents per kid.
4) One "big" present for you and your spousal unit. This is a single present for both of you.
5) One "small" present for your spousal unit.
6) One "small" present from your spousal unit.
7) Kanadia sux

Thursday, November 13, 2008

Andy's Speech Therapy Evaluation

So yesterday (Wednesday) we went to the hospital to meet with a speech therapist. She pretty much said what I knew. He can understand what you say to him but he has a hard time saying words. The words he does say tend to start with the right consonant sound but end with a "uh" sound.

So we're looking at weekly speech therapy for a while. Nothing big. Not a huge deal. It would be nice on the pocket book if we could do it once a month. But oh well. We'll live.

So that's the story on Andy's speech. Hopefully he'll be caught up sooner than later but it varies from kid to kid.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Ad Hoc Sandwich Sauce

So I wanted a quick-and-dirty-yet-good samich for lunch today. So I fired up the griddle. A half-pat of butter, a nitrite-free slice of ham, and a nitrite-free slice of turkey later, I was ready to grill that shizznit on some bread with a piece of swiss.

Here's the problem. I needed a sauce.

Never fear, Franks is here!

TBSP butter
TBSP dijon mustard
2 TBSP Franks Red Hot Sauce. Or Crystal. Or whatever.

Throw it in the nuker for 20 seconds.

Mix well.

Let it sit for about 10 minutes.

Put it in the fridge for 1 hour.

Or if you're like I was and are in a hurry, skip the fridge step and put in a salt-water bath for 2 minutes.

So yeah. Throw that on your griddled lunchmeat samich. Good Eats. I think even Alton would agree. ;)

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Telecommuting

I love it. I work from home Monday through Wednesday. Shortly before Andy turned two he hit the terrible twos. So the kids started going to the babysitter while I relax and work from home by myself.

Well, it's that time of year, along with the freakishly high prices of stuff, that we need to start cutting back on a few things. We need to save some bigtime money this month, so I'm working from home with Emma and Andy again just to see how it goes with the understanding that I'll just take some time off work if I can't work with them.

Ya know what? So far so good! They were very well-behaved yesterday. Today Joey is off school so I have all 3. It's been great actually. They are keeping each other entertained. I've been able to actually work. I can't believe it. And I'm saving $25 a day. $35 today with Joey being off.

I guess I'm pretty lucky that I have some good kids. It could have been much worse.

This time next year Emma will probably be going to school with Joey. Pre-school, not K. Then it will be just Andy and Dad. I'm afraid the poor little guy will be bored stiff. Maybe when that time comes he'll just go to the babysitter so he can have some social interaction.

My switch is finished rebooting, back to work.

Greg sux.

Monday, November 10, 2008

In Kanadia...

...today is a national holiday. They call it, "Nashinul Litur... Lita... Lut.. Lern 2 Red Day" On this day in 1987 the first book to ever be published in Kanadia was, in fact, published. This government-released nonfiction piece entitled, "How to Rape a Moose," was the first of its kind. Kanadians didn't know what to do, as only immigrants knew how to actually read.

With tens of billions of dollars in aid from foreign nations, Kanadia is proud to report that 21 years later, they have successfully graduated 3 high school students with an average reading level of an American 6-year-old.

Kanadia, we salute you. You're making huge strides toward literacy by actually teaching those 3 people to read. Who knows, in another 21 years you may actually be able to teach kids to count past 9!

A truly proud day for Greg.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

WTF?

Rams? Hello? What was that? I know you're a suckass team this year, but that performance today. What? Maybe you should be playing Kanadian Football.

Saturday, November 8, 2008

Never Gonna Give You Up

Never Gonna Let You Down
Never Gonna Run Around and
Desert You

Kanada Loves Rick

Thursday, November 6, 2008

Andy's Visit

So Andy had a visit with his oncologist a couple days ago to go along with his CT scan and blood work. It was weird being there again. Andy did real well. He knew where he was. He knew the people. But he wasn't scared. It's kinda like he knew it was over. He did get stuck with an IV but really he was okay with that.

It was good for me to be there again too. I can't really explain why. It was just good for my psyche for me to be there with the little guy. With a healthy little guy, that is.

Julie's home with groceries, must help carry in.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

I Love Kids

Today on the way to school I was explaining that Obama won and that it's really not a bad thing because he's better than W. Joey goes, "So if it's not a bad thing, does that mean he changed?" I asked him what he means. "Obama wants us to give our money to people who don't work."

I could have cried I was so proud.

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

Congratulations Barack Obama

It sure was an exciting campaign on both sides. We've known for the last 4+ years that this would be an historic election. We didn't see the curveball coming from Alaska. But it's been fun.

I gotta say I'm glad Barack beat out Hillary, although I was loving the whole Operation Chaos thing. If nothing else I'm happy because I don't have to hear her tenor monotone speeches. I really got sick of hearing that socialist bitch's voice. Although I'll admit that I did vote for Slick Willy in 1996. Hey what can I say, I was a freshman in college. :)

I do think John McCain was the most electable Republican. I know the staunch conservatives such as Rush didn't really like the idea of Johnny boy being the Republican candidate, but after the last 8 years, the US was NOT ready for another confirmed conservative. Mitt Romney would have lost to Barack by a landslide. And OBTW, the nation sure enjoyed Sarah Palin's 15 minutes.

This nation is cyclical. We give the dems a chance and they screw up. We give the reps a chance and they do fine. Then they screw up. We then give the dems another chance. They're fine. Then they screw up. Wash. Rinse. Repeat

And it looks like the Democrats are well on their way to getting a filibuster-proof Senate. Basically we're entering full-on Democrat years. I'm all for giving them a shot. Let's see how things go. If they start screwing up or moving too far to the left, we'll see Republicans start to take over in congress again. Then start moving toward reps in the White House again. It's a cycle.

Congratulations Barack Obama on winning an historic election.

Hey, it's kinda cool seeing Luke Russert on NBC covering the election.

Zombie or Socialist?

Tough call.

Fortunately I live in a small voting precinct tucked away in a forgotten part of southwest STL city. I walked in, stood in line for about 3 minutes, and was out.

Sorry to dissapoint everyone (except Greg and Julie of course), but I voted for McCain. I hate to turn my back on socialism like that, but there's something about the idea of having a zombie for president that fascinates me.

Although it will make every one of you except Greg & Julie happy, I do worry a bit about the fact that our next prezzy will be Hussein. Mainly for economic reasons. I do have a feeling, though, that McCain overplayed the socialism thing a bit too much. All liberals are socialists at heart, that's true, but I don't think Hussein will turn this place into a socialist state, as Johnny Boy would have us believe.

No matter who wins, they will DEFINITELY be better than W! You can't really get much worse! I can't help but wonder if he will go down in history as our worst president ever, even worse than Hoover and Tricky Dick. But let's not forget, even W was a better option that that fake-ass Kerry. I will now, for the fist time, admit that I regret not voting for Algore.

But I digress.

For what it's worth, I said in 2003 that Hussein would be our next president. If he wins, at least that's another one I can chalk up in the "First to get it!" column.

Vote wisely. It's better to not vote than to make an uninformed vote.

Sunday, November 2, 2008

Emma the Arsonist

So last night Emma was mad and in her room so she threw a lamp onto the floor. We found the lamp with a burned out bulb that burned quite a hole in the carpet.

Today she decided to put scissors in the microwave. She successfully started a fire. One fire extinguisher later and we're out a pair of scissors, a microwave, and a toaster. And a fire extinguisher for that matter since it was a one-time use deal.

Kids. *shakes head*

Saturday, November 1, 2008

Halloween

First of all, thank you Greg and Neighbor for changing my mind regarding Loot Gov and Prop B, respectively. I'll change my votes. That's part of why I posted, to be talked into changing my vote on things that I'm on the fence about.

That said, Halloween was great. The kids had a great time, they got a lot of candy, and best of all Andy wasn't in the PICU this time around!

When the kids went to bed I went downstairs and jammed on the ol' acoustic gee-tar for a bit. Julie and B went down to Julie's sister's for a bit. When they came back they brought Julie's dad who hung out while the kids slept while we went out and played for a bit.

Hey Greg. Do they give out Munchos and Labatt in Kanadia on Halloween?

Andy has a CT scan on Monday. This will be weird.

I left some unfinished bidness at work yesterday so I could leave early. And I hate having unfinished bidness.

The kids have a house full of candy but instead want Cocoa Puffs. I love it.

I really think it's time to bring back our troops so we can use them to invade Kanadia.

That's enough for now. As Brian Boitano would say: By-eee. (cuz that's what Brian Boitano'd do!)

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Time to Make Some Enemies

Ok all. Time to make some of you hate me.

STL Ballot, 3rd US Rep Dist; 4th Senate Dist; 65th State Rep Dist:

President: McCain - I'm all about money and economy. Despite what the competition claims, a vote for a republican is always a vote for smaller government and a generally better economy. Ask any economist. (except for the fact that W was an idiot so he's an exception but was still better than Kerry would have been) Don't worry my liberal friends, I'm well aware of the fact that Barack Hussein Obama will win, but I gotta give my support to Johnny boy.

Governer: Hulshof - Kenny voted NAY on the financial bailout. That's good enough for me.

Lieutenant Governer: Kinder - Just going off what I've seen on the smear campaigns.

Secretary of State: Hubbard - I'm not a Robin fan.

State Treasurer: Lager - Because he's an R.

Attorney General: Gibbons - Why would I even think of voting for Koster???

US Rep Dist 3: Sander - Carnahan voted AYE on the financial bailout. He lost my vote for this reason.

State Rep Dist 65, Circuit Attorney, Public Administrator, Sheriff: The only option on the ballot.

City Treasurer: Williams - It's either him or a Green Party candidate and special interests suck.

All judges to be retained - The MO bar recommends all to be retained, that's good enough for me. I have no beef with any of them. We'll see what happens when red light camera cases make some noise at any of their benches.

Amendment 1: Yes - I won't dignify this with a description.

Amendment 4: No - Will feed money to special interests if passed.

Proposition A: Yes - Loss limits are stupid and discourage tourism. Schools need money!

Proposition B: No - Gives more power to special interests. Could increase healthcare costs.

Proposition C: No - I'm not a fan of big government. Let's let the market make these decisions for the power companies, not the government.

So there ya have it. I'm sure I've lost a reader or two. Sorry to see you go.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

More on Red Lights... *UPDATED*

Update: Although the STL city ordinance still exists (click), it looks like the Missouri law that was written exactly the same is OFF THE BOOKS! This makes the STL law ILLEGAL in the eyes of the state of Missouri! I'll have to do some digging. Note the rebuttable presumption clause in section 4b. Do some Googling on rebuttable presumption to see just how unconstitutional this really is. End of update

This is in response to the person who compared red light cameras to a parking ticket:

Look at the way the laws are written for parking tickets and the like. Apples and oranges. In the case of a parking ticket, the owner of the vehicle is responsible. And by having the registered vehicle, you understand this. The only exception is if the vehicle was stolen. If you can show your police report that you filed when your vehicle was stolen, you will not be responsible for your parking ticket.

In the case of a red light ticket, the driver is responsible, not the owner of the vehicle, although they issue the ticket to the owner. But you must prove that you were not the driver! Presumption of innocence goes out the window. This is unconstitutional.

If they were to take a picture of the driver and properly serve them with a summons (in person) instead of a threatening non-registered letter that poses as a summons (fraud), it would be different. No, I take it back. Because it's about REVENUE not public safety. I take exception to any kind of traffic policing that is about revenue as opposed to public safety.

Not sure who setup the site. It's pretty unprofessional but is backed by a few lawyers, one of which I know personally. It's the petition that counts though.

You won't win this battle. I've done too much research, in conjunction with a lawyer acquaintance of mine who is equally as pissed off about these. I'll debate all day, though, if you wish. Just make sure you know what you're talking about before you post.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Keep This In Mind

Speaking of people to vote against. I'm not sure who's up for re-election, but here are your congressmen and women who voted FOR the Wall St. bailout.

Senators:
- Missouri: Kit Bond, Claire McCaskill
- Illinois: Dick Durban, Barack Obama

Reps:
- Missouri: William Clay, Russ Carnahan, Ike Skelton, Emanuel Cleaver, Jo Ann Emerson
- Illinois: Jesse Jackson, Daniel Lipinski, Luis Gutierrez, Rahm Emanuel, Danny Davis, Melissa Bean, Janice Schakowsky, Mark Kirk, Gerald Weller, Jerry Costello, Judy Biggert, Timothy Johnson, Phil Hare, Ray LaHood

That said, here are the nice folks who can safely be re-elected (they voted no:)

Senators:
- Missouri: NONE
- Illinois: NONE

Reps:
- Missouri: W. Akin, Samuel Graves, Roy Blunt, Kenny Hulsof
- Illinois: Peter Roskam, Donald Manzullo, John Shimkus

It should also be mentioned that on 10/2/2008 after the VP debate in St. Louis, William Lacy Clay stated on camera to KSDK that he would vote no. As you can see, he voted yes.

RedlightCameraBan.com

There's an Arizona-based company, American Traffic Solutions that is installing these cameras, apparently for free in many cases. In return, they get up to 40% of the revenue from every ticket issued. I really have to wonder about this company, as the red light camera laws enacted in every state all read almost exactly the same. And since Mayor Slay really tried to rush this through without due process (do some Googling, this was paraphrased from an RFT article a year or 2 ago).

My biggest beef with this civil liberty-violating law is the fact that it doesn't identify the driver. And the law reads that it is the responsibility of the vehicle owner to prove that it was not him or her driving the vehicle. THIS IS UNCONSTITUTIONAL! The constitution of the United States specifically states that we are innocent until provent guilty. It's called presumption of innocence. Read up on it.

There are dozens of reasons why these cameras need to go. In my not-so-humble opinion, here are the biggest reasons to oppose them:

  • The laws are unconstitutional
  • This is more about revenue than public safety
  • The driver is not identified (see unconstitutionality)
  • Up to 40% of the ticket money leaves our area and goes to ATS in Arizona
  • I really suspect ATS of some shady dealings but can't prove it
  • THIS IS A CIVIL LIBERTIES VIOLATION


That being said, head out to RedlightCameraBan.com and read up on it and maybe even sign the petition. Right now they're just working on the city of St. Louis but they are hoping to expand this to the entire state.

Thank you to KTVI (Fox 2 in STL) for running the story about this website.

For what it's worth, Francis Slay and Kathleen Hanrahan will both lose my vote by inaction.

Sunday, October 26, 2008

The Pumpkin Farm

Yep. Today was the day. Rombachs Farm in Chesterfield. This year Andy had hair. And there was no stroller. And the kids had a blast. They really got a kick out of the pony ride.

Joey picked out our big pumpkin, the one that we will carve up. Emma, Andy, and Joey each picked out a small pumpkin for themselves.

We came back and had some of Mommy's chili. I used my homemade chili sauce that's ketchup-based but contains a buttload of fresh peppers. Hot stuff.

I'm really really tired.

The Rams lost but they played a good game against an underrated Patriots team. The Rams needed a new coach and a new QB. They're half-way there.

Friday, October 24, 2008

Caught Beneath the Landslide

So I had to go to Andy's hospital a few days ago. As you know I work for the same healthcare system. His hospital is one of my hospitals.

I'm the wireless guy, among other things. And I had to lay out some wireless access point locations.

This included both the cancer center and the 4th floor.

It was weird. To say the least. When I saw Andy's nurse at the clinic (aka the cancer center aka the Costas Center), she gave me a big hug and I thought I was going to completely lose it. In fact I had to whisper, out loud, "you can do this" just before I walked into the clinic.

But I still haven't cried. Not once. Not once since 8/9/07. And I don't know why. Maybe it's a defense mechanism. Maybe this PTSD shit will go away when I finally am able to cry. For what it's worth I almost made it to the crying point a week or 2 ago when I had to pin Andy for Julie to put a bandaid on him. I felt like I was in the 4th floor treatment room pinning him so they could re-access his port. I almost thought I was there. But I digress.

Yet I felt so safe when at the Costas Center or on the 4th floor, even though I was there on "official business." There was something about the Costas Center. And the 4th floor. I felt so... welcome. And at home. And, believe it or not, kinda at peace.

I think I need to volunteer a few hours a week or even a few hours a month to Glennon.

I brought a fist-full of pictures with me. Everyone was so happy to see Andy. Andy's Costas nurse even mentioned that he "grew into his eyes." :)

Andy still has memories. Or some kind of subconscious something-or-other. Emma had her toy stethoscope. She wanted to listen to Andy's heart. He didn't hesitate to hold up his shirt. And when Julie was putting a bandaid on him.. He freaked when she opened it because it looked like opening some Tagaderm. That is, the tape used to hold the port needle in place.

It's funny how lately I lose memories all the time but for some reason certain things from a year ago seem to feel like they just happened 3 minutes ago.

And a champagne supernova in the sky.

Thursday, October 23, 2008

How Strange...

...Joey actually seems upset that he's off school tomorrow. He LOVES school. I was always good in school but I always hated it. Then again he's the complete opposite of me when I was his age, from a social perspective.

Fun Facts

- Emma, despite having older and younger brothers and no sister, is a girly-girl who loves princesses and whose favorite color is pink.

- Schlafly's Oktoberfest kinda tastes like flavored APA.

- Your DTV converter box will NOT convert your 1993-era TV into HD. Trust me. It won't.

- The most humiliating thing to ever happen to me was within the last month. Don't ask me what it was because I won't say.

- Celeine Dione is B's idol.

- Brian Adams is Greg's idol.

- The new Metallica CD sux and is a pathetic attempt at going "old skool."

- AC/DC is shooting themselves in the foot by not allowing their new one to be sold on iTunes.

- The economy will get worse before it gets better.

- PTSD kicks in overdrive when I go to the Costas Center or to the 4th floor of the hospital.

- Joey has no school tomorrow OR next Friday.

- Your DTV converter box STILL will NOT convert your 1993-era TV into HD. Trust me. It won't. Please believe me.

- Energy prices suck.

- Kanada sux.

- Kalifornia sux.

- STL rox.

- Drunken lesbians rox.

- Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Halloween

Just a quick reminder that not only is 10/31 Halloween, it's also the first anniversary of the day that Andy had his cancer removed. It's a very special day.

Happy Halloween!

Monday, October 20, 2008

How Unethical!

In this time of economic crisis where even banks won't lend to each other and we all need to start buying what we NEED not what we WANT, I see a credit card commercial with a guy going out and buying a brand new huge HDTV with the music saying, "I want it all. And I want it now!"

Really? I want it all. And I want it now. Is that really what we need in this time of global economic crisis? Banks won't even lend to each other yet you are encouraging people to get a credit card and spend money they don't have? What?

And this is followed by a commercial for another credit card company advertising their credit card lab where you can customize your own. In other words, trying to grab the < 25 demographic.

Boylan's soda rox.

Greg sux.

Liza Minelli is scary.

I missed DnD last night because I was on call and extremely exhausted. Fuck call.

Overheard on a golf course: "SHIT!" "lol I love golf"

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Vote for the Kanadian Kow!

We all know that happy cows come from Kalifornia. And of course we know Gracie is a happy cow. Which obviously means she's from Kalifornia. Or is she?

Vote for the happy cow. In particular, vote for the Kanadian Kow! Her name is Kirsten. http://www.realcaliforniamilk.com/auditions/

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Hello Again!

I've been busy. And tired. Which means no time for the Internets. Or the Intarweb for that matter. Since this site is on the Intarweb, that means I haven't had time to post.

So hello. How are you? I'm fine. Leave a message and I'll get back with you after I return from the dark side of the moon.

Andy's in the PRIME of his terrible twos.

But. Here's the great news. Emma is potty trained! She wears a pullup to bed but I think we can stop doing that soon.

Interesting factoid. This is Kanadian week on Wheel of Fortune. The episodes were filmed in the great white crap. And B just said that Celeine Deione is her hero.

Bunny slippers rox.

So do Munchos.

Wednesday, October 8, 2008

Now I'm Nervous

Wall Street's show of no confidence a couple days ago, after the bailout passed no less, really shook me. I can't help but get a really dreadful feeling.

Oh yeah and OPEC is cutting production because they're "losing money" with the decreasing oil prices.

It's finally hitting us. Granted, since the little guy's copays have been paid off, we've grown accustomed to a slightly more expensive lifestyle. But still. It has finally hit the Kelley family. It was a nice few months there having an extra dollar or two! :-/

Fortunately Julie wound up in a recession-proof industry and I wound up in one of the 3 or 4 industries that are actually growing in this economy. I think our jobs should be safe, so that's less of a worry.

Like everyone else, we'll just have to make cutbacks and ride this out. Just know that this could get really bad.

Long story short: W is an idiot, but the bailout plan will actually work in the LONG-TERM. The problem is the short-term. It will be up to either Johnny Boy or Barack Hussein Obama to come up with a short-term solution to keep us going. A $1000 economic stimulus package won't cut it this time.

OBTW, AIG execs need to be put in a federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison.

OBTW again.. Our first cutback will be cellphones. We pay a LOT more a month than what we're getting. Any suggestions on how we can save a lot of money but still keep at least one cell phone in the family? Anyone know anything about the prepaid minutes or anything? Please e-mail me.

Monday, October 6, 2008

Go Rams!

The Lions seem to think that they have the NFL's worst team. Are we going to put up with that crap? I don't think so! C'mon Rams! Stink it up. Let's get ourselves an overall first pick.

Buncha idiots.

Friday, October 3, 2008

Great Job KSDK!

It was pretty cool watching channel 5 last night after the VP debate. Those reporters were like kids in a candy store. They had a huge slew of reporters in the spin room. It's not every day we get a debate in St. Louis where they are the home team.

They looked like they enjoyed what they were doing. And they did a good job.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

It's Chili Season!

Julie made her first chili of the season tonight.

It roxed.

Especially with a piece of bread with Ms. Kanadian's peach butter!

Fo shizzle.

Monday, September 29, 2008

OK People, Listen Up!

The Humane Society does not put down animals just because they haven't been adopted. They stay there until adopted.

Let me repeate this.

The Humane Society does not put down animals just because they haven't been adopted. They stay there until adopted.

So you need to get rid of your dog for whatever reason? But you're afraid the Humane Society will put the dog to sleep if he's not adopted out? Fear no more.

I'll say it one more time.

The Humane Society does not put down animals just because they haven't been adopted. They stay there until adopted.

Hey HSMO people. Tell your PR dept. to get the word out! Why does everyone think this is the case?

Hey Rams. Thanks for taking my advice re: head coach.

Hey Haslett. Make me look smart, k? thx.

The Rams New Coach?

Incase you haven't heard, the Rams have fired Linehan. Good move. I don't care what the national idiots say, it was a good move.

Now move on. What about Haslett? For those of you who don't know his history, he was the coach of the Saints back when we had quite a rivalry going with them. It was well-known that he and Mike Martz didn't like each other. It's important to remember that he hated Martz, not the Rams. In fact, OPace, Little, and Holt are probably the only remnants of that team.

For the last year or 2, Jim Haslett has been our defensive coordinator. Ok so he hasn't done that great of a job, but then again I'm not sure that he's had a chance.

The Rams need a defensive-minded coach. And a coach who likes the run. That's Jimmy boy.

I hope the Rams make Haslett the head coach for the remainder of the year. This would be a good thing.

Saturday, September 27, 2008

When Life Gives You a Lemon...

Julie asked me to take care of the applesauce for this evening's Q. She took care of the hard part. She peeled, cut, and cooked the apples. I was to add the goodies.

I decided to try brown sugar instead of white just to see what it would taste like.

I don't recommend this practice.

It was inedible. It tasted like brown sugar.

Julie was grilling pork. Ribs and chops.

So I took all the various BBQ sauces we had in the fridge and a couple or 3 tablespoons of butter and threw it all in with the destroyed apple sauce.

Most of the BBQ sauce is Super Smokers extra spicy crap.

So in the end we had a very apply, spicy BBQ sauce. That was just made for pork. It really roxed!

Friday, September 26, 2008

OMG! My Eyes!

So I looked in the mirror today. I paid special attention to my eyes. Wanted to see the dark spots under my eyes and see if they're better or worse. They're better today than they've been all week. That's a good thing. But they have a LOT more wrinkles. I couldn't believe what I was looking at. I didn't look like that a month ago.

So AT&T has finished running fiber to my neighborhood. I need to meet da man at my house today to dump the DSL and get on their UVerse fiber network. 10Mbps! w00t! Well, for 30 days anyway, then I get cut back to a 6Mbps connection. But still, that rox. And now that it's on fiber, only one way to go from there!

I'll be playing Kanadian Golf tomorrow. My father-in-law and our golf buddy will be playinig regular golf. I'll be sharing a kart with the Kanadian, so we'll be playinig Kanadian golf. Kanadians don't use drivers, they use 5-woods. But for whatever reason they outdrive everyone else. Kanadians also say things like, "Fuck Golf" at random times. And they don't know how to putt. Must be all the hockey.

Tomorrow night: BBQ + booze - negativity = fun.

OBTW.. Has anyone heard from Ba? The greatest Kenyan to ever grace the face of the planet?

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

PEDIATRIC CANCER SUX!

An acquaintance's son was recently diagnosed with cancer.

wtf?

WTF?

WHY????

My beer skunked on me. Dammit.

cancer sux. especially pediatric cancer.

Existing

Pretty much sums it up. I just can't seem to get past "a year ago, ____ was going on." I'm open to suggestions.

In the meantime, Greg continues to suffer from his camel STD.

Julie rox. I think I'm done with my blowups. But she still is there for me to lean on. And god knows I need it.

The kids are doing great. Joey continues to rox in school. Emma is still Princess Ralph. We just need to get Andy talking.

*sigh* back to work.

Monday, September 22, 2008

Damn Weather Changes!

Seems I was perilously close to catching the "West Virginia Virus" over the weekend. Over the last few years I haven't been that prone to catching this kind of crap except for during weather changes. And guess what time of year it is.

But I got lucky. I took Julie's advice on Saturday night and took 2 Benadryl and passed out at like 8:00, sleeping for 12 hours. Did the same last night. Not much energy today but the cold symptoms are gone.

Staying hydrated, etc.

In unrelated news, it turns out that Greg's genital scars did, in fact, originate from an STD known only to be carried by camels.

I should probably elaborate on this.

Greg was at the Royal Kanadian Zoo as part of his community service for trying to impregnate a Kanadian mountie's horse (directly of course). Anyway, he was asked to feed the zoo camel. So he prepared a nice candlelight dinner, wine, etc. One thing led to another....

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Julie + Chicken + Grill == RAWX!

Really. Her chicken rox. And I mean real chicken. Not boneless, skinless shizznit. I mean legs, thighs, etc.

I don't really know what else to say. I'm still in heaven from last night's meal.

Bite my ass.

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Experiment Over

It didn't make me feel better. Still the occasional mood swing / outburst / fuck the world.

That said, I will strive to limit my additives and preservatives but won't go out of my way.

But the caffeine headaches are gone, as is the desire for soda. That's a huge plus.

Hey Greg. Put your right thumbnail on your heart and try to bite your ear. Take a pic of that and post it please. Kanadian.

Not the Easiest Time

I guess I keep going back to "a year ago..."

Perfect example. Emma recently got her ears pierced. They need to be cleaned and turned every night. She doesn't like it. It hurts her. The other night Julie asked me to restrain her. Afterward I was shaking. The idea of restraining my kid while a painful procedure is done... Been there, done that, had enough of it.

Things are bothering me. I just need to get through it.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Despite All My Rage...

...I am still just a rat in a cage.

Pumpkins are always quotable.

So I'm redoing my post from last night. I was pissed at the world, which I've been a lot lately.

Sorry for hurting feelings.

But yeah, I feel like I'm taken for granted sometimes.

No biggie. It happens.

We move on.

Sunday, September 14, 2008

How 'Bout Those Rams!

Buncha fucktards if you ask me.

In other news, Emma now has 2 additional holes in her head. I think P took some pics. Maybe she can post some?

The boys are loving their bunk beds which are actually not stacked at the moment as Joey was a bit nervous.

Wanna know what it's like to live in Kanadia? Rent Trailer Park Boys. Funny movie.

Soviet Kanuckistan!

Greg check out "Use Me" by Hinder. Tell me who they remind you of. about. on. aboot. on top of.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

My Experiment

So I've decided to try something. I'm going to go 7 days without eating additives, preservatives, Yellow #5, etc. See how I feel...

I'll keep you informed!

It starts..... ..... .... NOW!

Friday, September 12, 2008

Sorry

We all have to go through pissy / whiney / say-mean-things stages. I think I'm going through some pretty bad grief right now.

Whatever.

Sorry.

Cancer sux.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Emma's Dr Appt

Emma really impressed the doctor. You know Emma, if Joey does it she has to do it. Her potty training, her talking, just her overall development. The doctor was really impressed.

Emma has come a long way in the last 14 - 15 months. You may recall she was quite the "neurotic toddler" there for a while. This has greatly improved. She's still a bit difficult but really no more than any other difficult 3-year-old.

She got a shot but these kids don't really mind shots. They watched their little brother get shots every night for months.

She's 25th percentile in height and 30th in weight, or vice-versa. In other words, she's a petite little princess.

Emma rox!

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

It's Been a Year

It's been a year since grandpa died. A year and 10 hours to be exact. Still coming to grips with it. See ya tomorrow when I'll be in a better mood.

Monday, September 8, 2008

Another Crazy Weekend! (but good)

Friday night gave way to an impromptu small gathering of friends, as often happens on Fridays. I would be remiss if I didn't give a huge "Cancer Sux!" to my uncle's father-in-law who lost his battle recently and had his funeral on Friday.

Saturday, as many of you know, was going to be Emma's birthday party. But our block party was that day so we had to move it to Sunday.

It's weird that no only are we no longer the youngest couple on the block, there's quite a few younger couples on the block now and I felt like one of the old guys at times.

Emma's birthday party was fun. Julie did the grilling so I could watch the Rams get stomped. *sigh*

On the bright side, our long-lost drinking buddy has returned from hurricane chasing! That roxed!

Tomorrow is the 1-year anniversary of losing Grandpa. ouch.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Emma's Birthday Party

This Sunday! It's been moved from Saturday! If you show up on Saturday we'll tell you to go shit in your hat.

Sunday is also the Rams opener at noon. So we'll see ya around 1130ish? 60" HD

1 Year Ago...

...I was in Tucson saying goodbye to the man who had a huge part in making me who I am today. Andy's counts were up, so there was no concern there. But we were a couple days away from going back to the hospital for the second round of chemo.

So a year ago I was saying the goodbye that I had always dreaded more than any other, while putting my son through cancer treatment. And today my biggest problem was that I overslept and had to make Joey eat breakfast on his way to school instead of at school.

I call that progress.

I seem to recall a year ago making a post that I was emotionally numb. I still am. Maybe it's not a bad thing. Maybe it is. Who knows.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

We Miss You!

We have a friend who is out of town helping with hurricaine efforts. While we admire the efforts, we also miss you! Not the same without you. Too many long faces!

I was half-expecting Julie to have to go out of town to help with hurricaine efforts. I got lucky. As painful as it is to have to go out of town, it's even more painful when she goes out of town.

In a completely unrelated story, electrons discover their identity

Saturday, August 30, 2008

About the Deletion

Sorry. Had to delete a post. Too much whining. It drove me nuts when I read it.

Things are going okay. Had an extremely busy week so that I could enjoy my 3-day weekend. And I'm now enjoying my 3-day weekend.

Cancer sux.

So do hurricanes.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Long Story Short...

...I've been thinking a lot about Andy's treatment lately. I've been cranky. But happy too, if that's possible.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Cah Leh!

No I'm not pronouncing my last name funny. I'm not naming mantras from the cardinal Ultima series. I'm actually speaking Andese.

It's no secret that Andy is running a bit behind in speech development. Chemotherapy slows things down. You remember us being worried about his not walking just before he started walking. His doctor wants him to be saying 2-3 word sentences within a month or we may be looking at speech therapy.

He points and grunts. He has a couple of words he says but usually when he wants something he just points and grunts or says, "Hey!" I'm trying to break him of it. I made him tell me he wanted a cup. Then I made him tell me he wanted milk. The result was "Cah leh!" (cup milk)

He's getting there. If he needs a bit of speech therapy, no biggie.

Don't sweat the small things. And nothing in life is big.

Pics coming soon! Julie if you're reading this, post some of your favorites on your Myspace and I'll link them to this page. Of course you're reading this. Do it. ;)

Sunday, August 24, 2008

New Look Coming Soon!

I mentioned that I picked up thekelleys.org. If you go to thekelleys.org now you'll see that it's just a plain ol' vanilla Google Site.

Not really sure about the content yet but at least I'm going to start migrating toward the new template. The first part of the change will be to this blog. If it's even possible. We'll see.

So if you come to the site and it looks different or is broken, I apologize, I'm probably goofing off.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

Old Friends!

So I was playing around on the new Ubuntu Linux box, figured I'd fire up the IM software. I popped in my AIM info and my ICQ info. I had a nice chat with some friends who I haven't seen in 10+ years! It was pretty cool.

I also talked to some UO friends. I've been away from there for way too long. Need to get back.

I'm also remembering why I ditched IM a whle back. Too distracting. Next thing you know you're in 3 or 4 different conversations and you can't do what it was you set out to do to begin with. :)

Anyway, I know some of ya are reading. Hello all!

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a couple of 2 year olds that need their asses kicked. Have a good Saturday!

Wednesday, August 20, 2008

@thekelleys.org

I've been waiting for a while for a short list of domain names to come available. I grabbed thekelleys.org. If any of you (with the last name Kelley of course) would like an @thekelleys.org e-mail address lemme know. 'dan' is taken of course.

Also, if you go to kelleydad.blogspot.com notice you'll be redirected to dan.thekelleys.org. I rox. u sux. Greg is gonna get his ass knocked back to Kanada if he doesn't straighten up. We need to send Michael Moore to Kanada. etc. etc. etc.

Dan + Soda = IBS?

Ok so here's the deal. I ran out of Pepsi a couple weeks ago and told Julie not to buy anymore. I got myself into the habit of walking up to the gas station for a 44-oz Coke in the morning and making it last all day. When that's gone, I'm onto water. And by "all day" I mean until after lunch.

So I'm cutting WAY back on my soda intake. I'm also increasing my water intake. Not sure which is doing it, probably both, but I haven't had to take an IBS pill in a couple weeks. Basically, since around the time I ran out of Pepsi.

It seems I may have found a culprit!

And Greg, quiet or I'll knock you back to Kanada!

Monday, August 18, 2008

Joey's School Day

Well, it was a good one. *sigh of relief*

Joey was a bit overwhelmed when we left him, but once he ate breakfast and went to his class he was better. There's only 16 kids in his class, so that's much less intimidating.

The general theme of today was behavior and getting used to being in school.

Oh, for what it's worth, he played basketball at recess. :)

Quite a good first day, when all was said and done. He's looking forward to going back tomorrow.

More later, it's bath time.

Joey is at School!

How crazy is that? My baby boy is at school.

He was a bit overwhelmed. We dropped him off and took him to the cafeteria. He walked in and realized he was the smallest one there. He's not used to being the smallest! But he waited in line with his backpack in one hand and lunchbox in the other. We'll see how it goes.

More later upon Joe's triumphant return! ;)

Thursday, August 14, 2008

Open House at Mason Elementary

This evening was Joey's open house. And I must say, I'm extremely impressed. If you believe what you hear on the news about St. Louis Public Schools, you're wrong. As was I. I have a feeling the district is pulled down because of some of the north side schools or some of the less-than-savory south side schools for that matter. Mason is different.

So long story short, we met his teacher, the music teacher, the art teacher, and the gym teacher. We also met his counselor. I'm going to give his counselor a call to let her know about Joey's little brother. I'm also going to have a talk with him about how it's not really appropriate to bring it up. I mentioned it to his teacher and she said she knows how to deal with it when he starts talking about it. All I wanted to hear.

School starts Monday. We're all very excited. Joey is just THRILLED! This is good. He won't be one of the kids who cries when we drop him off. Of course mommy will be one of the moms who cries when we drop him off. :)

Exciting stuff. Can't wait!

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Michael Phelps Can Get Any Woman He Wants

Alicia Sacramone, on the other hand...

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Breaking News from Kanada!

I was just informed by a Kanadian official that the "freecreditreport.com guy" is actually French Kanadian! Please be on the lookout for this man. If you see him, throw eggs at him!

Monday, August 11, 2008

Economic Shakedown Possible!

Ok, what I'm waiting for is a margin call in the commodities market. That aside, the market is fixing itself.

Now that the summer driving season is coming to an end, oil prices are dropping.

I would say there's about a 75% chance that ONE of the following will happen (assuming no war, natural disasters, etc.):

Option 1) We'll see a slight increase in oil prices toward the middle of the month in an attempt at an empty market correction. After this, the bottom will fall out of the oil market, the bubble will pop (some think this is already happening), speculators will panic, and the price will go WAY down. Sure it will come back up next summer but will be nowhere NEAR $4 a gallon. Probably less than $3.

Option 2) We MAY see a slight increase in oil prices toward the middle of the month in an attempt at an empty market correction. After this, the oil prices will drop again but the dropping will lose some momentum as we realize that the prices aren't ALL because of speculation. Next summer's driving season will see prices near $4 a gallon but won't get up there again.

Of course, nobody can see the future, and it's very possible that the truth will be somewhere in the middle.

Here's the problem. A big part of why oil is dropping as fast as it is dropping is because we've made adjustments. What happens if we have $2.50 gas? Will we go back to being gas hogs? Will it pretty much put an end to the "green" movement? If so, we'll be back here in a couple of years.

If the botom falls out of the oil market, will we start seeing prices of other items going back down? Or will they stay where they are? That is, if option 1 comes to fruition, we'll go from stagflation to potential severe inflation, thus actually WORSENING our economic situation!

Be careful America. We're walking some very fine lines here, economically.

OBTW, if you have more than $100,000 in any single bank account, split it up! And don't forget about interest. If you have any more than $80k or so, I'd start splitting. I don't think we've seen the end of the bank problems.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

Andy's Party

Judging by the calls I'm getting from hungover people, I'd say it was a good time!

After grilling 60 burgers, 60 brats, 20 hot dogs, and the peppers for the black beans & rice, I joined the party, already in progress. The turnout was good, and everyone had a good time. I spent all day moving from group of people to group of people, mingling, etc. It was awesome.

We really appreciate everyone's coming out. It meant a lot to us. And I think we can all agree it went a LOT better than Andy's birthday a year ago. It was certainly a lot more fun than we were having 365 days beforehand (the day of Andy's diagnosis).

Mr. Andy was the center of attention and he knew it. He loves attention and yesterday it was all pretty much aimed directly at Andy. It was awesome.

Thank you all again. I need to go out to the backyard to finish cleanup. And thank you all for using the trash / recycle bins. Fortunately cleanup wasn't bad at all. :)

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Black Beans & Rice

All I'll say is this: Fresh peppers.

UPDATE: I'll add this: Grilled.

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Happy Birthday Andy!!!

Mr. Andy is 2 years old today! What a crazy year it's been for the little guy. So glad it's over!

Have I mentioned that 2 year olds are a pain in the ass? And now I have 2 OF THEM!

"But it wasn't that much!"

If you're going to help your friend get his computer up and running and plan on having a couple adult beverages in the process, make sure it's not 5.5% BEFORE you decide how many you'll have.

Oops.

To quote Alanis, you live you learn.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Kindergarten!

It's either feast or famine. I'm posting 2 or 3 times a day, like today, or I'm going days without posting!

So Joey is starting Kindergarten on the 18th! It's shank or be shanked for Joey, as he'll be going to STL public school. Not really that bad. He'll be going to Mason Elementary, which seems to be a decent school. We have open house next Thursday, so we'll see how it goes.

All supplies have been purchased. We went to Target over the weekend to take advantage of Missouri's tax-free weekend for back-to-school items. Joey was SO excited... as was I. And yes, Patience & Greg, there were a LOT of MILFs there at the same time. That always helps. :) Joey got all of his supplies including a Transformers backpack and a Cars lunch box! We're excited!

Once we have all kids in school, we should be able to afford private school. So by the time Joey's in 2nd or 3rd grade, he can transfer to a private school. The problem is we can't afford babysitter and school, just or the other.

Then again, it may turn out that Joey likes Mason and decides to stay there. That's fine too.

I can't believe Joey's already going to kindergarten!

Thinking about Emma, born 9/7/2005, and Andy, born 8/6/2006. Depending on the cutoff date, Emma and Andy could be in the same grade! Sheesh!

Brown Recluses

Yeah, we have 'em. Fortunately I do not have arachnophobia. It's close, but it's not there. In fact, I've peacefully coexisted with quite a number of brown spiders for the last year or two in the basement. I even had a friend who I watched go through his entire life cycle over the course of a few weeks.

I always assumed they were wood spiders, perfectly harmless.

Then we discovered that they are brown recluses. Naturally I freaked.

We (ok, Brandy and Julie) got rid of a bunch of em. But it's still freaky. Knowing they were brown recluses. Downright freaky.

We were going to get all of our Christmas boxes moved to the attic prior to Andy's party. This won't be happening now, as that's the kind of place where my friends the recluses like to hang out. I'll wait until we can get an exterminator.

Freaky.

Friday, August 1, 2008

It's Official - The Nightmare is Over!

The port is out. We have it in a cup in a drawer in our room. The nightmare is officially over.

I'm tired.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

Twenty, Twenty, Twenty-Four Hours To Go...

...till Andy Gets Sedated...

Can't wait to get that port out!

Brocksmith is a Kanadian wannabe.

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Quake

Let's look at that word and what it means.

Quake \ˈkwāk\ intransitive verb 1 : to shake or vibrate usually from shock or instability 2 : to tremble or shudder usually from cold or fear

Quake \ˈkwāk\ noun : an instance of shaking or trembling (as of the earth or moon); especially : earthquake

Quake was a groundbreaking FPS in the mid to late 1990s. It was immediately followed by QuakeGL which allowed for 3d cards to be used in a FPS for the first tme. It was subsequently followed by a number of sequels. I love Quake.

In the midwest, we have a slight quake and we make a huge deal about it. It's the second coming, it's the apocalypse.

Kalifornia just had a pretty big shaker and they call it a "drill for the big one." They could really care less. In fact, they were making fun of the tourists who were totally freaked out by it. Speaking of Kalifornia, they're on fire again. And STILL not screaming for FEMA! Hows about that?

Depending on who you are and where you are, the word quake can have quite a few meanings. For the geek in me, though, Quake will always have one special meaning: fragging llamas!

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Just Like One-Hit-Wonder Natalie Imbruglia...

...I'm torn. (thanks Dr. Cox!)

I love the Eagles. I always have. I always will. I'm still kicking myself in the p'tooer for missing them in 1995 or whatever it was.

But nosebleeds are $40 a pop. And I don't want nosebleeds. And even if I did, I don't want to pay $40 a pop.

But this may also be my last chance to see them.

Take it easy.

Monday, July 28, 2008

I Take It Back

Walk is a fun song. It's a metal anthem. It comes in at a solid #2 in my all-time best metal songs list.

Creeping Ktulu is the best metal song of all time. That is, Creeping Death immediately followed by Call of Ktulu, as on the album.

I apologize for any confusion.

Thank you, and have a nice GO SCREW YOURSELF!

Friday, July 25, 2008

Andy's Getting His Port Out!

Friday, 8/1! Yep! That means that by the time his party comes around he will not have a port!

I've been thinking. Once his port is out, the nightmare will truly be over. And once I make it past 8/9, his date of diagnosis, things will get better.

Go Andy!!!!

Monday, July 21, 2008

More Random Neurons

If people are at all like computers, which we are not, then "random" is a truly abstract idea in the sense that it does not exist. That said, we're not at all like computers, so we do have a random sense of neurons firing. Quite literally. It's very easy to let your brain light up a few random neurons. Your brain will decide how important randomness is, so to speak.

Leading the news today, STL has been home to quite some murder suicides as of late. Yeah. Ok. Are we really that unimaginative? Seriously? How about a new paradigm? STL will never be #1 in anything, psychopathic murders included, if we can't create someting new!

P&B, you're life savers.

If you're drunk and have an extra free MP3 download (pepsi points?), by all means download Africa by Toto! Even when you sober up, you'll admit that you can't beat the price.

Miss Vickie's, although Kanadian in orgin, are awesome chips. In particular, the Kelleydad-Dubbed Pride of Plano, the Miss Vickie's Hand-Picked Jalapeno chips..... well.. Let's just say they r teh rox.

KB @ 4:20

Joey is showing that he could very easily learn Spanish right now. Wondering how we can accomplish this?

Have I mentioned that 2-year-olds are a pain in the ass? And that I really have 2 of em now? 3 if you count my dad...

The best part about going to Home Depot on a Sunday afternoon is the MILFs. Interperet that however you will.

I hear the secrets that you keep...

Greg really likes men of Kanadian descent.

Friday, July 18, 2008

Party Idea

So here's an idea for Andy's party. A little party game, maybe.

Everyone gets to kick Greg in the ass for a dollar. No limit on the number of kicks you purchase and they can be used at any time throughout the afternoon / evening.

Here's the kicker (pun not intended). Don't tell Greg what's up. Just walk up to him and kick his ass.

All proceeds go in my pocket.

No Comments?

Speak up! Kanadians!

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Andy's Birthday / Cancer Sux Party

Ok so 2 long posts in one day. I was going to put this on the "news reel" post (see below) but felt it worthy of its own announcement.

Friends, family, and cancer haters,
Andy's birthday is 8/6. The following Saturday just happens to be 8/9. This just happens to be the day he was diagnosed, one year ago.

So.. Saturday, 8/9 will be Andy's birthday party and Andy's "Cancer Sux" party!

We would like to request that only family bring gifts for the little guy. We are expecting an unusually large number of people in and out that day and if everyone brought a gift we would be loaded with more than we can handle. Seriously, if you're not family don't bring a gift. Maybe donate a few bucks to one of our favorite cancer charities instead? You know the ones we love.

So of course it's Andy's birthday party but also with the "Cancer Sux" theme. Everyone has been touched by cancer one way or another. This is not only a celebration of Andy's full recovery but also just a chance to give a nod, so to speak, to our friends, loved ones, or even ourselves who have had a battle with cancer.

Bring any beer, soda, ice, etc. We will be providing food.

The party will be held at Andy's house.

Please RSVP no later than 7/31. If you're reading this then you have a way of contacting us to RSVP and for directions / address.

Please forward this on to your usual list of people. Maybe I already invited some of them, maybe not.

The Kelley News Reel (Andy Update!)

I've either been too sick or too busy to make any significant posts lately, so here goes.

First Andy. We went to the hospital yesterday to meet the surgeon. Seems like a nice guy. He has no problems getting the boy's port out. He was more concerned about the hernia that started it all. Left alone this type of hernia could potentially cause bowel blockage and ultimately... well.. we don't need any more problems.

So they did an ultrasound on Andy who was extremely well-behaved during the procedure. No meds necessary to get him to sit still even!

Once the surgeon looks at the ultrasound he'll decide if Andy still needs to have the hernia fixed. Either way we'll get his surgery scheduled soon.

At the hospital people kept stopping us in the hall to say hello to the little boy in the car who's no longer in the car. A couple of people recognized him from the billboard.

We went to the 4th floor. They were really excited to see him and how healthy he is. One thing I noticed in our stay there was that they always like to see their recovered kids. The fruits of their labor really.

In other news Joey's home! He had a great time. My dad claims they went sightseeing. Joey said they got lost and drove all over Kansas City. All a matter of perspective.

It's looking like shank or be shanked for Joe. Public school for kindergarten and probably first grade. I'm thinking by the time we have 2 in school and 1 at the babysitter we should be able to afford private school.

Joey lost another tooth! It happened while boxing with my brother. Ha!

Emma. What can I say? She's our Em! It still amazes me how fast she is picking up on things just from doing whatever Joey does. She sure looks up to her big bubba.

On the Kandian front, Greg's wife caught him in bed with a man.

On the radom neuron side of things, I do not exceed the speed limit on the highway. If I'm driving across state and the speed limit is 65, I go 65. Not sure why. I just do. Actually yes, I know why. With every action I take on the road, I ask myself, "Can I afford a ticket?" If the answer is no, I don't do it.

Julie's grilling kick continues. Every time I turn around the BBQ pit is fired up. I'm definitely not complaining!

Let's see.. Sports. Why can't the NL win? Why? Why? For the love of hell, guys! Win a damn game! Screw the yankees! Screw the sox!

Economy! Gas prices should be either at their highest point of the year or almost there. Assuming no hurricanes, war, or other uncontrollable significant factors.

Nuke Kanada!

Monday, July 14, 2008

I Miss Joey!

Joey's on vacation with my dad. They went to KC for a week, just to hang out. He's having a great time but I miss him. 2 weeks will have gone by in which I will have seen the oldest just 2 days. :-/

In other news, Kanada still sucks.

Monday, July 7, 2008

A Big Update; Info on the Cancer Sux Party

Sorry I haven't made any updates on anything in a while, it was quite a long weekend. I accidentally tied one on Friday night (hate when that happens) and that was only the beginning. Next thing I know it's Sunday evening and I'm in frickin Dallas. *sigh*

Anyway, for the update. Andy is officially off all meds related to chemo! It gets better. He is getting his port removed, probably next week.

Yes, the nightmare is almost 100% officially over!

Andy's birthday is 8/6. He was diagnosed 8/9. It just so happens that 8/9 falls on a Saturday this year. It's looking like we'll be having his birthday / Cancer Sux! party on Saturday, 8/6. Details to follow, but mark your calendar.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Again, Kanada

No drowning! Stupid Kanadians. They have to warn each other not to drown themselves. And apparently they make policies such as "no drowning."

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Courtesy of B

The Root of the Kalifornian Problem

Although it's in jest, this pic pretty much sums up the root of the Kalifornians' problems. This is an accurate protrayal of how Kalifornia views the rest of the country. And this is why they feel they have the right to tell the rest of us how to run our lives.
http://graphjam.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/funny-graphs-californians.gif

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

Last Night's Grandpa Dream

Not exactly an unusual one. But it's a big step backward. We were at his house from when he lived in St. Louis. They're often there. And they often center around the garage for whatever reason.

So I'm doing something in the garage. Waiting for Grandpa and the rest of the Kelleys to show up. The kids are with me. Then Andy ran off. A man brought him back, holding his hand. This man was waiting for Grandpa to show up.

Jung would say the man was the death archetype. Andy ran to him but he brought him back to me. Then the man was waiting for Grandpa to show up. You do your own interpretations but I know how I'm working it out.

So Grandpa finally showed up but the man disappeared for whatever reason.

The back story was that for whatever reason after I left him in Tucson he suddenly got better. I wanted to ask him if he remembered my "last" words to him but couldn't get up the courage.

Then all of a sudden my kids weren't there anymore. While Grandpa was in another room I was crying because I knew the end was near for Grandpa.

Knowing Grandpa was loosing it a bit I asked him if he remembered his great grandson who was undergoing chemo and I brought him up to date on it. It took him a minute but then he remembered. He was happy to hear Andy was doing better but not necessarily overjoyed.

That was the end of the dream.

I had another weird dream last night. We took Andy in to get his port removed. At the same time the city was under an invasion. I got shot on my way in. I had Julie and Andy on the back of a motorcycle trying to get to the hospital as quick as possible while dodging bullets. I wasn't so lucky. But it didn't really hurt that bad.

So we finally got Andy to the hospital. It turns out there was some cancer left and he would have to undergo 3 more chemo cycles.

End of the dream.

Weird night. Explains my lack of energy and my strange mood today.

Monday, June 30, 2008

Ouch!

I played my first golf game of 2008 this last Saturday. My office's golf tourney. Our team came in 7 under par (includes 1 mulligan and 2 toss 'ems per person). But we still maanged to come in last place. 14th out of 14 teams. Not sure how that happened. But the schwag. Oh the schwag. It was a fun time.

But now I hurt. I even made it a point to stretch prior to the game. Kept myself hydrated. blah blah.

30 sucks.

I should point out that the running joke of the day was to refer to Greg as a Kanadian. The funny part is that I didn't really infer that he was Kanadian. It just came out. "Why is it that everyone thinks I'm Kanadian?" says Greg. That was funny.

Friday, June 27, 2008

Peter Griffin! (fixed)

Sorry for the bad image. It's now fixed.

Happy Friday!

Greg is a Kanadian crap weasel!

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Someday You Will Find Me

Caught beneath the landslade,
And a Champagne Supernova in the sky.

How many special people change?
How many lives were living strange?

'cause you and I will never die.

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Random Neurons Firing!

It's been quite a while since the last time random neurons fired like crazy. Right now I'm sitting here waiting for a job to finish for work, so I have a few spare minutes. Time for a brain dump.

Greg. What else can I say? You're Kanadian. You'll always be Kanadian. Quiche tastes like crap and is only eaten by homosexual Kanadian dwarves. Munchos aren't bad but breakfast? Kanadian!

Kalifornians. Please quit trying to run the country.

This video aired on Noggin which is a channel that the kids watch. I find this disturbing on many levels.

Why aren't displaced flood families screaming for FEMA like in Katrina? Oh yeah, because they actually heeded warnings. And they're not used to having everything handed to them by the government.

PTSD sux!

Cancer sux!

Kanada sux!

Greg sux!

I have a Kandian flag hanging in my basement. Courtesy of Greg of course.

The thinner deli meat is sliced the better it is. Unless it's ham. I love a ham steak.

I'm going to grill some ham steaks. And I'm gonna smother them in habanero jelly while they're on the grill. That will rox!

Andy's running a bit slow, developmentally, from a speech perspective. He's just not wanting to talk. He can understand what you say to him but he just won't talk.

Emma's running a bit slow on potty training. She simply won't go.

Courtney Love is still a skank ho.

"I don't think they realize how much they suck!" -- Dave Grohl, c1992-ish, talking about Extreme.

I have no sympathy for drug addicts. Don't get me wrong, I'm of the view that if people want to do something fun that gives pleasure, go for it! But if you get in too deep, it's your own damn fault, get out of it or go the hell away. You probably got there from feeling sorry for yourself to begin with. of about on under beside.

I can't listen to Champagne Supernova without getting that dreadful feeling.

I still haven't shed a single tear over the whole Andy-cancer thing. Not one.

P&B are honorary Kelleys. We still can't thank the two of them enough for everything they did for us while Andy was sick.

We need to get Greg's mom and dad over for some BBQ sometime soon!

I have a golf tourney coming up this Sunday. Should be fun.

2-year-olds are a pain in the ass!

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Ow, That Hurt!

Andy slept very late today. Like until 9am.

But I wasn't exactly complaining about that! (see my "burned out" post from yesterday)

When he woke up I walked in his room. He normally pops up and gets excited. Instead he was just lying there looking at me.

When I picked him up he just put his head on my shoulder and let me carry him. Last time he did that was our last time in the hospital when his counts were around 1.

Andy may have caught a little bug that's slowing him down a bit.

The problem is the feelings it conjures up. Deep, dark feelings that I haven't felt in a while. Andy sick. Not a good thing.

Immediately my stomach felt like it was being wrenched and twisted. The IBS meds helped a bit with this.

It's weird. When my kids get sick I pretty much take the, "You're okay, drink fluids and get over it" approach. Not insensitive but not over-comforting either. It's different with Andy though.

I guess I'll run this incident past the counselor I've been working with. (with whom I've been working, sorry Greg)

Classic PTSD I guess.

CANCER SUCKS!

Monday, June 23, 2008

Burned Out

Monday - Wednesday here's my schedule:

6:30am - Emma wakes up. The crying & screaming for no reason begins.
7:30am - Andy wakes up. The crying & screaming for no reason begins.
8:00am - Joey wakes up. He's well-behaved.
9:00am - The crying and screaming finally subsides.

All throughout the day - I'm constantly harassed for something to eat. If I give in to one, they all want the same thing.

All throughout the day - Emma and Andy fight over cups.

Lunch time - They all have to have exactly the same thing. If one has something that the others don't, they start screaming.

I get some peace between 11:30 and 1:30 (sometimes later) while the younger ones are in bed.

1:30 - 3:30 - More screaming for no apparent reason.

After Julie gets home she takes over a bit but I can't rely on her to take 100% of the load.

I'm burned out. These little 2-day and 3-day vacations aren't cutting it. I need 2 weeks away.

Not gonna happen.

Free Hat!

Southpark.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

What a Nice Weekend!

Friday, as I recall, we did a whole lot of nothing.

Saturday I bbq'd (technically I grilled) my world famous hamburgers. I made a BBQ sauce at around 11:00am and let it boil down for about 3 or 4 hours. Did my burgers, threw them on the grill. I took the spices from my sauce that didn't get mixed in and coated a few strips of bacon with them. The bacon, too, went on the grill. Top it off with some grilled-on cheddar and some grilled vandalia onions and we had one helluva meal! P&B came over and helped us enjoy the Q.

Of course the buns were grilled too. I brushed on some melted butter w/ garlic to add to the effect. :)

Today (Sunday) we went to the in-laws. I went with my father-in-law a few days ago to help him pick out a computer. Helped him get setup today. I bought some 410 shells on the way out because Joey wanted to shoot and a 410 is a good place to start. I fired off one shot to show Joey what the recoil would look like. After that loud noise he decided no way.

But no big deal. Because we took his Little Tykes Hummer H2 out there with us this time. He had a blast riding it all over that big yard.

Of course it was capped off with some BBQ chicken. :)

Friday, June 20, 2008

Add Kid Rock to the "Cool" List

Wow, 2 posts in one day yet again.

Anyway, here's why Kid Rock is on the "Cool" list now.

Andy Thanks Me Every Day

I can't really describe it but I'll try. Every day, give or take, Andy gives me the knowing look. I saw that look many times when we were in the hospital. He'll follow that knowing look with a hug, maybe a kiss, or some other form of affection.

He knows that he and Daddy went through something and that there is a special bond. He thanks me every day.

I know this will pass as he begins to completely forget about everything. I'll enjoy it while I can.

You're welcome Andy. I love you too.

Thursday, June 19, 2008

Training Training Training

Sitting in training. Boring. Training classes tend to move at the pace of the lowest common denominator. *sigh*

Hey Greg. u sux

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Add Kiss to the List

Metallica was bad enough with Napster. Their integrity sold on e-bay for about $2.00 a few weeks later (true story). Then they came out with this crap a few weeks ago. They're officially on my "never pay for again" list.

Add Kiss to that list. Not that I would put money in that arrogant asshole Simmons' pocket anyway, but now I have an official reason. Here's why.

My response to that article: go back to the 70's Gene.

Andy's Hospital Visit

When we got to the hospital Andy knew where he was. He walked straight back to the Costas Center. However, when I opened the door to Costas he didn't want to go in. In fact he wouldn't. I had to pick him up. He used to love the playroom in Costas.

He's up to 25 pounds now!

So anyway his port was accessed and he was sent back to CT. He didn't really know where he was going but when he got there he knew where he was and recognized some faces.

After some minor sedation they did the scan.

No hearing test this time. They'll do that in a couple of months.

We'll be talking to the oncologist in a couple of weeks. I really hope to hear that we'll be getting his port removed at that point. We'll see.

Basically an unventful hospital visit. Andy's Costas nurse, as well as the CT nurses, were happy to see him looking healthy. When you work in that situation I guess you're always happy to see the success stories.

After the hospital visit, we went out to lunch with mommy. Andy enjoyed it!

More later.